#1 I bump into things.
There’s something just wrong about having excess fats. I get bruises all the time while having no idea what happened. So I bet I bumped into something and because I have fats, I couldn’t feel it and just see the result as an aftermath. I never had this dilemma before. I seldom bump myself into a table, a chair, or even a wall. Is this just fat, or am I just really being clumsy?
When I wear my pair of jeans, or shorts, or skirt, and take a picture, I see my ugly bulge in the tummy. I get so conscious even though I can just edit it if I want to. I never had this before. I didn’t have to cover up my tummy in a picture before. I can post whatever pose I want because I have nothing to hide and be conscious about. The bulge has become one major factor why I don’t want to take photos of myself.
#3 My face is like a full moon.
I used to have a small face – small head. And I was advised to keep my hair long so it wouldn’t be that obvious that I have a small head. I feel like my head is too small for my body since I also have a kinda-wide shoulder (I probably got it from swimming when I was younger). So it isn’t really proportional. Then suddenly I got fat, and my face looks like a moon cake. It’s sooo cute, actually. It’s too cute you just want to squisshheeyyy it.
#4 Friction in my thighs.
Crispy pata. Drumstick. That’s what I call my thighs. I know if I’m getting bigger or thinner because of my thigh. My fats used to go directly into it. Like before, there’s this () <– my thighs are shaped like that when I sit and put them together. But now, it’s like this —> ||| — no more gaps. And whenever I walk, I can feel my thighs meeting each other… causing friction. Lol. This wasn’t a problem before.
#5 I feel so heavy walking up and down the stairs.
I’m not really used to walking since Bacolod is such a small place and I used to drive… so walking to and fro the workplace is like an exercise everyday of my life. They don’t have pedestrian lanes in Edsa, of course. So I have to use the stairs going to MRT to be able to cross the other side of the road. And it’s soooooooooo tiring. I can barely catch my breath. I’m all so pawis na pawis when I arrive in the office and I don’t like that. I don’t know if the stairs are a good thing. But if it is, I should’ve lose weight long long ago. Instead, I feel like my calves are forming some muscles which is ew. -.-
#6 Everyone keeps saying “fat”, “tambok”, “you gained weight” etc.
Uhhh, obviously. Like.. seriously? I know that – no need to point it out. Really. I’m fully aware of how I look and what’s going on with my body. I weigh 47kgs by the way, and it’s actually normal for my age and height. It’s just that I have small bones so getting all these extra baggage is such a big deal. But really, enough with the “you’re fat” kind of thing. Just think of it this way, you have a very big pimple in your face and everyone keeps saying, “You have a pimple” or “Your pimple is red” or “Your pimple is big”, “Your pimple is ugly”, “When will you get rid of that?”, and the list goes on with the word “pimple” on it. Would you like that? Really, would you? This has to stop. If I lose weight or not, enough with this. Hahahahhaa, gakasakitan ko. Charot!